Wednesday, November 2, 2011

AVS GAMEDAY PRIMER: Phoenix Coyotes, 11/2/11

Know The Enemy: Phoenix Coyotes (5-3-2, 12 pts); beat Los Angeles 3-2 in OT on Saturday.

Key On This Guy: Coyotes leading scorer Ray Whitney, who had scored goals in three consecutive games prior to Saturday's win over the Kings. The wizened Whitney has always struggled against the Kings, dating back to his unsuccessful attempts to overthrow Charlemagne.

Laugh At This Guy: Internet Enforcer Paul Bissonnette, prolific tweeter and alleged porn star wrecker. "Biz Nasty" has carved out an entertaining niche for himself, tweeting verbal blumpkins from the can, which he refers to as "twooping".

Don't Sleep On This Guy: Underrated Martin Hanzal, one of the most efficient defensive forwards in the NHL. Hanzal also has a developing offensive arsenal, and if he had played on a team that anybody actually paid attention to, would be compared favorably to Penguins pterodactyl-on-ice Jordan Staal.

Fact About The Coyotes That May Or May Not Be Made Up: Before placing their new arena in the suburb of Glendale, the former Coyotes ownership group led by Steve Ellman searched for a site located closer to and more convenient to downtown Phoenix. A list of these sites includes Las Cruces, New Mexico; the site of the former Koresh Compound in Waco, Texas; the inside of a dormant volcano in Oahu, Hawaii; and New Zealand.

Celebrity Prediction: Wile E. Coyote

Oops, sorry...that's his prediction for the fate of the franchise in Glendale.

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